Conversations with “My” Self

Some of the best conversations happen internally. Sometimes they are honest, raw and real, and sometimes they’re delusional, anchored in bullshit assumptions, and just a waste of energy. Getting better at noticing the delusional stuff as monkey mind chatter, rooted in the false sense that “I” somehow exist apart from all that is, has been a lifelong pursuit.

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 The ability to notice the difference between the egoic self and Self is one result of a lifetime meditation practice. While meditation was developed as a spiritual practice designed to reveal the nature of reality and the divinity of who “we” truly are, it bears gifts well before that enlightenment. One such gift is the ability to hear the crazy, ceaseless chatter of the mind as something that isn’t real and then detach from and remain unaffected by that chatter. Realizing that doubt, fear, anger and suffering are created in the mind based on a false, egoic sense of self brings peace, freedom, intuitive insight, creativity and a deeper awareness of connectedness. Worth some effort!

 As a simple practice to remind yourself of this connectedness, when you speak or write informally, try to stop using personal pronouns (I, you, he, she, it, we, they, me, him, her, us, and them). The first two paragraphs are an example of that. It’s hard to write that way, and harder to speak that way. People will definitely think it’s weird because the English language (and most others) requires us to define the person (Who is speaking?), the number (one or more than one) and the gender (feminine, masculine, or neuter). The language of awareness, though, communicates connection, oneness and has no concept of difference or separation. In the language of awareness, there is no “I,” no “you,” no separation.

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 Want to express gratitude? Say “thanks,” not “thank you.” Want to share an idea? Say “How about going for a hike?” rather than “I think we should go for a hike.” Want to make a point in writing but still sound like a native English-speaker? Put pronouns in quotation marks. Yeah, “I” know. That one’s a bit weird. Perhaps to get started, just notice every time “you” use a personal pronoun. Each time “you” do, it reinforces the notion that “you” exist apart from “me” and everything.

 The goal, as consciousness increases, is to see perfection in everything, as everything and know that the world created with the mind is an illusion. Heavy stuff and not easy to grasp or explain with words. But notice how language helps reinforce the illusion. In noticing, the walls begin to crumble and a sweet, cool breeze brings peace and clarity.


Pete Colgan works with sales and marketing professionals who want fulfillment so they can manage stress, build thriving business and create successful, happy lives. Consider investing in yourself to truly understand what brings you joy and how you can use that awareness to increase revenue and kick your life and career into high gear. Whether through one-on-one coaching, or a cost-effective group coaching program, what you discover will help the work you do feel effortless! Click here to learn more.